One thing I have realized over the course of my life: I don't believe in punishment. Inflicting hurt on someone to teach them not to inflict hurt on others - well, I just don't believe in that.
I never believed in it. I am so thankful that my parents didn't believe in it either. Because if I had been punished, I think I might have turned out overly rebellious. My parents never really punished. A couple of times they just had to let us know who was in control, which we knew clearly about all the time, because my parents were the kind that you had confidence in and the kind that you didn't want to disappoint. But, neither Mom nor Dad liked punishment at all.
I have never respected anyone who really believed in punishment, because I think that anybody who is comfortable with punishment is basically sadistic.
As I survey the morality of our society and our criminal justice system, I see very clearly that the idea of what morality is all about is that it is "keeping the riff-raff under control, and keeping them down, and reminding them that they are shit." That's what punishment is about: teaching the punished that they are worthless.
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I think the fact that you don't believe in punishment made a huge difference in how I view the world, and on my own perception of punishment, mercy, and how I view/interact with others. My own passionate disbelief in punishment is a driving force in my life... and I think it's one of my favorite things about myself. So, thank you.
ReplyDeleteThe most stupid experiment with punishment that I remember is that when Jimmy hit you once when you were both little, I spanked him. And, immediately it felt stupid. I never did it again. You can thank Jimmy for me never doing anything stupid like that towards you. It is nice to have an older brother, I guess, when it comes to things like that!
ReplyDeleteOne reason I really love defending criminal cases is that I basically hate punishment. Sure, I understand locking away a person who is a real danger to others. But, punishing people because their lifestyle isn't what the "moral majority" approves - what inhumanity, what lack of decency!